I was talking one day with a student about the behaviours that might be considered advantageous in a physical conflict – and gave him a homework project to think of a list of 5 or 6 – then to write about them – and of how they might also have positive aspects in constructive relationships.
In thinking about it later I gave myself the same task and came up with the following list. It then occurred to me that actually they are all facets of the same thing – each related to the others – labels with the same content seen from a different angle – each compliments the others – and indeed each has its positive aspect that would be a valuable behaviour in a caring/loving relationship. They are not good or bad – we get to choose the end to which we put our skills and seeing both aspects we get to make that very human choice of who we wish to be. Tai Chi simply provides a means of developing those skills and exploring their value.
They are in no particular order although I have in some cases grouped more closely related items together – the whole exercise is really about provoking thought.
In looking at the value of these behaviours in positive, caring and loving relationships we can usually look at the way the behaviour works in a negative way and do the opposite and so this is the format I have adopted in the following notes – first the behaviour – then the way it works in a destructive relationship like a fight – then the way it works in a creative relationship in italics. Both represent harmony in their own way – as so often in life – it is all about the intention – how the energy is directed.
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